I Hate Tom Cruise » 2007 » May

The Low Spark of High Heeled Boys

I Hate Tom Cruise — Wed, 23 May 2007 22:10:57 +0000

See, Tom Cruise is 5’7”…when he’s wearing three-inch heels.

I Hate Tom Cruise Hate Mail

I Hate Tom Cruise — Thu, 17 May 2007 22:40:56 +0000

We hate Tom Cruise, which inevitably makes people (read: the Dutch and Scientologists) hate us. Let’s dig into the I Hate Tom Cruise hate mailbag, shall we?

From: Bob the Builder
Date: May 4, 2007
Subject: –

Why not put your energies [sic] into something positive instead of slaggin [sic] of [sic] someone else?

Clearly you don’t understand that hating Tom Cruise IS positive.

From: Mark
Date: May 11, 2007
Subject: hi

I would just like to point out that you must have a very large amount of free time to be sad enough to create a web site that solely abuses tom cruise and his family.

A few pointers :- [sic]

you havnt [sic] got tom cruises [sic] millions for starters.

you are probably a lonely person or people

when tom cruise dies he will be remembered, who will remember you?

you [sic] just a sad low-life that needs to grow up!

Mark, we would just like to point out that your random punctuation and atrocious spelling aren’t helping you get ahead in life. Also, thanks for your concern about our loneliness and legacy, but we’re doing just fine. Remember, Xenu loves you!

From: tom
Date: May 16, 2007
Subject: looser

what a looser [sic] you really are, you are either very jelous [sic] or have a couple of screws loose. Its [sic] tom cruise’s personal business what he does and when he does it. Grow up and make a website about something decent you prick

This coming from a person who can’t even spell “loser.” Tom, Tom, Tom…you poor, misguided, functionally illiterate soul. Thanks for the chuckle.

TomCat

I Hate Tom Cruise — Thu, 17 May 2007 02:10:58 +0000

Just when we thought we couldn’t possibly adore I Can Has Cheezburger more, they go and post this.

It’s official, folks—we’re in lolcat love.

[Photo via I Can Has Cheezburger?]

Cruisazy-Ass Links

I Hate Tom Cruise — Wed, 02 May 2007 20:58:14 +0000

While Tom is away, Katie will play…with her new co-star [Dlisted]

Tom looks fat, Katie looks lobotomized [Perez Hilton]

Tom continues to buy Brooke Shields’ friendship [PopSugar]

Katie has had enough of Grandma Cruise [Celebrity Baby Blog]

Katie has to take Scientology “mommy classes” [Defamer]

Katie is sick and tired…and suddenly we have new-found respect for Victoria Beckham (didn’t see that coming!) [Lainey’s Entertainment Update]

[Photo via IDLYITW]